


Don't Leave Me

by brahe



Category: The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: M/M, Spoilers for The Death Cure, it's emotional, there's tears
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-16
Updated: 2015-02-16
Packaged: 2018-03-13 07:16:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3372608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brahe/pseuds/brahe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Newt heard the words and he knew that Thomas wanted to believe them, to back them, but he knew by the sound of his voice that Thomas has already accepted Newt's fate as much as he ever would.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Don't Leave Me

**Author's Note:**

> ENJOY THE FEELINGS.

Thomas wasn't going to stand for this. "No!" he shouted, taking a step towards Newt. "No. That's not how this is going to go. You're not going to leave me like everyone else. You're not going to die. You're not going to leave me," he said, breaking off with a sharp sob followed by deep breath.

"I'm already dying, Tommy!" Newt yelled back. "It's too late, you can't do anything now." Thomas didn't say anything for a while after that, only stared at the ground. Newt watched his shoulders rise and fall with his breaths.

"I'm not going to let you die," he said eventually. He sounded almost weak, worn out like he had run forever and decided to give up. Newt heard the words and he knew that Thomas wanted to believe them, to back them, but he knew by the sound of his voice that Thomas has already accepted Newt's fate as much as he ever would.

"Tommy," Newt started, reaching out a hand to touch his face. He hesitated, though, his hand hovering in between them like all the things they left unsaid. Then Thomas closed his eyes and Newt extended his arm the rest of the way to cup the side of Thomas's face. Thomas leaned heavily into the touch and Newt felt his heart break a little more. Thomas turned his head and pressed a lingering kiss to the inside of Newt's hand before turning forwards again and looking at Newt with shiny eyes.

"It's not fair," he whispered and a few tears escaped his eyes. He knew he was being selfish with this; he should be the one comforting Newt, who was on his way to die. But he didn't care, because he hurt _so much_ and he was going to take what he could get from Newt before he was nothing but a memory. Newt stepped to Thomas and wrapped him in an embrace that was much more intimate than a hug. He moved his hand from Thomas's cheek to the back of his head and twisted his other arm around the boy's waist, holding his head under his neck and his body to his. He felt Thomas tremble just slightly with suppressed sobs, and Newt felt tears sting his eyes as well. He wasn't ready to go. Not in the least.

"Tommy," he said, surprising himself with the steadiness of his voice. Thomas picked up his head from Newt's chest and blinked at him. "There's something I want to tell you," Newt told him slowly, hesitantly, because he wasn't sure if he was ready to admit it. "But only if you want me to," he added, and he knew Thomas would know what it was now, whether or not he said the words aloud.

"Yes," Thomas nodded. Newt brought up his other hand and tangled them both in Thomas's hair.

"I love you," he offered with a sort of half smile he hoped didn't look as sad as he felt. Thomas made a sort of strangled noise and Newt panicked for a second, but then Thomas's hands were on his face and he was kissing him, hard and desperate and sad. His lips tasted like salt from the tears and Newt was overwhelmed with sorrow because it took them this long to admit it and who knows how much time they had left together. Whatever they had just started would be built on the knowledge of a fast-approaching end and the shaky feelings of bittersweet love because this wasn't going to last. They both knew it wouldn't, and it wouldn't be healthy either, but when Thomas kissed him Newt didn't care. He didn't have much of a future left anymore, so he was going to enjoy the here and now while he was still here.

"I love you," Thomas whispered in return, searching Newt's eyes for something. "I'm not sure what I'm going to do without you," he said, and Newt kind of wanted to cry because the way he said it made it real, oh so real, and all Newt wanted to do was forget. He wanted to tell Thomas that it'd be okay, they'd be okay, but he couldn't bring himself to lie. Phrases like _we'll figure it out_ and _I'll be fine_ died on his tongue.

"You'll make do," he said instead, and Thomas gave him a watery smile that was more sadness then happiness. Newt kissed him again because talking hurt more than anything else and he couldn't take the pain, not now, not when he had this chance to be happy for a bit. "I'm sorry," he whispered against Thomas's lips, and Thomas held him tighter, kissed him harder. Newt felt wetness on his face and he wasn't sure if they were his tears of Thomas's.

"God, we're a mess," Thomas muttered while they took mirroring deep breath and Newt laughed, sharp and quick.

"We certainly are," he agreed, and for a moment the air around them wasn't heavy with what was to come. "Are you sure you want to do this?" Newt asked, because he knew the end wasn't going to change, and if the situation were reversed he knew he wouldn't be okay.

"I'm sure," Thomas said and Newt kind of expected it. He would've said the same thing. "I'd rather have this now then not at all," he admitted, and Newt agreed with a kiss.


End file.
